Frequent statements and questions…
I should be able to cope with this by myself…
A commonly held view. You may feel that you must keep things in the family, not talk to anyone else about your problems; you may worry about trusting others, or tell yourself there are others who are much worse off than you and that it’s a sign of weakness to ask for help. Here’s a typical analogy: If we sustain a physical injury, a broken bone for example, we seek attention from a medical practitioner. We don’t carry on in the hope that it may heal itself and there’ll be no lasting damage.
We go through a process of repair and recovery, sometimes with ongoing treatment to ensure full healing and the best possible outcome. Our emotional and psychological health and welfare warrants equal care and attention.
I have great friends...they’re there to listen to me
Having great friends is just that: it’s great. Though they may be great listeners, the difference between good friends and a therapist is the lack of emotional involvement. That doesn’t mean there’s a lack of care-far from it. It means there is a clear perspective seen through a different lens without an emotional attachment. As a therapist I hone in on aspects that friends may not notice, and I reflect what I see back to you.
I am tuned into your differing states and pick up on verbal and non-verbal cues that can help us get to the core of an underlying issue. Some friends say what they think we would like to hear because they care for us and want us to feel better; this can leave us stuck and wondering how to move on. If I hear or see something unhelpful I will raise it and find out more; I will challenge you, always with respect and empathy, and in doing so, change is more likely.
It’s just talking about stuff isn’t it...how can that make a difference?
The power of talking cannot be underestimated. A therapeutic conversation is not a chat; it is an exploration of what ails us, taking us to a deeper place of understanding to support growth and change. It can be tough at times, but the rewards can be of great value and potentially life-changing. As well as talking, according to your individual needs, I suggest behavioural changes for you to implement alongside our sessions:practical ways of doing something different to support progress.
These are suggestions; it’s not the job of a therapist to tell you what to do. However, the time between sessions is as important as the sessions themselves: it’s when you reflect on the content of the session and test out what you are learning.
Contact me in confidence on: tel 07706 813 692 or email:
